This week, I launched the Kickstarter to print my first ever photography book, Beauty Hunting.
Despite it’s apparent simplicity, this book has been three years in the making - but it didn’t start out as a book at all.
It started as a way to escape.
When the pandemic hit, I was in the process of untangling myself from a decade-long relationship. My then-partner struggled with alcohol addition, and things finally came to a head a few months prior and the decision was made that we had to separate for the good of everyone. I grew up with addition in my family (the generational wounds of that go really deep - and that’s a story for another day), so all that prior trauma was simmering in the background as well.
And then, lockdown.
So there we were, stuck in a tiny house, barely speaking, and with no access to our usual coping mechanism: busying ourselves with work.
I couldn’t really think, or function. I was burned out from all the stress and didn’t think I’d ever take another photograph again. So I went walking to a local nature reserve.
I’m not a walker. I didn’t even know that place was there, a mere 5 minutes walk from my house. I definitely didn’t appreciate its expanse - over 44 acres of grassland and blackberry bush, covering what used to be a gravel pit and a landfill site - or thought anything much of it.
I took my camera with me to help me detach. To focus (pun not intended) on something other than my current situation. I can’t meditate, I’m too restless for that, but doing something with my body like walking and taking pictures allowed me a form of meditation that helped re-focus clear my mind.
I wasn’t planning on doing anything with the photographs, or showing them to anyone. There was no agenda, no race to take a perfect shot, no pressure to even look at what I’d taken.
But eventually - about a year in, as my walks finally lifted the brain fog - I knew there was something there. A meaningful story that was worth telling. A tool for ongoing recovery that I could share with people.
And so, Beauty Hunting was born.
The term beauty hunting was coined by American author Jen Pastiloff to describe the active process of looking for beauty, of paying attention, of stopping and noticing. It's finding beauty in simple and mundane things like steam swirling up off a mug of tea, the smell of your child’s hair, or the light peeking through the curtains on a summer morning.
I met Jen (and devoured her book, On Being Human) the autumn before the pandemic. I was inspired by her story and her approach to living, and followed her ever since. I like to think of it as serendipity, one unexpected thing leading to another. Isn’t this how the best things happen in life?
So that’s where the title of the book comes from, some wise words by Jen that resonated with me: “What is the antidote to the terribleness of the world? It’s beauty hunting: the key to survival”.
So there.
Sometimes a body of work can happen without much of a plan to make it. With most of my projects, although I don’t usually sit and ideate (most of my project ideas come from a throwaway comment, or an interesting story or life experience), for Beauty Hunting I wasn’t even aware I was making a body of work until I had it in my hands (or on my hard drive, as it were).
Next time, I’ll write a bit more about the process of designing the book itself.
In the meantime, if this story resonates with you, I’d appreciate your support of my Kickstarter to cover the printing costs of the book so I can get this book out into the world, and hope it can help others in a similar situation. Even a small pledge or sharing a link with a friend can make a huge difference!